Self Love ft Precious Melody

Monday, April 01, 2019

 What does SELF LOVE – in the context of - choosing myself first - mean to me?

Choosing yourself is mastering the art of loving yourself, putting your happiness first before everything/ everyone else.

 When first did I learn or discover it's importance:

Growing up in a broken home and having to face rejection from my dad at a very young age, I always felt like I had to work extra hard or rather do something in order for people to accept me or love me in return. 

Without realising it, I started looking for validation in all the wrong places. I would always put other people’s needs ahead of mine with the hope that they would love me back or rather allow me to fit in.

My light bulb moment came when I was laying on the hospital bed after trying to commit suicide because  my first boyfriend had left me for another girl. I was quite broken and I felt that my whole world was crumbling right before me. The experience was painful both physically and emotionally but it also helped me to realise that I was not living my life for me and that I did not love myself enough to think that I was worth living for. 

It hit me quite hard that I had been living a life of making other people happy whilst neglecting myself and my own feelings. After going through the motions of that experience. I promised myself that I would love myself more and choose myself every day because the truth is when you are so full of internal love there is nothing that's on the outside that would break you.

 How has 'Choosing Self ' impacted my life?

It's crazy how when you own your truth and put yourself first,  you then effortlessly attract healthy relationships. I have become so liberated, mastered the art of listening to my heart and the ability to stand for what I want even without anyone’s support or approval and that's really an amazing space to be.

 What are the 3 most important benefits I have experienced from Choosing 'self'?

1. I can now say NO! Choosing yourself involves not being present in places where you don't want to be present. Turning  people down is not always a terrible thing to do, sometimes it just means that I am practising a little safe-care and putting my needs ahead of yours and that is OK. 

2. Confidence: When I started choosing myself more often I became  very confident in my ability to make solid decisions and owning my voice. I am now able to freely express myself without the fear of rejection.

3. Freedom: Now I don't feel the need to put up an act or perform some kind of a duty for anyone to like me or love me in return. I have also learnt that my life matters and that I would never ever attempt to end my life because someone else didn't choose me. God chose me way before I was even born and I choose myself everyday that's reason enough to feel content.

 Any advice to a younger woman struggling in that area

  • Make a commitment  to love and trust yourself more than anyone else (apart from God of course). I promise that you will never regret this! 
  • Always take time to get to know yourself better. Pay attention to the things that make you happy or sad and ask yourself why you feel that way. Always make sure you keep check of your heart.
  • In as much as it always feels safe to seek counsel from friends and family learn to trust your intuition, it will never lead you into the gutter. That's your gift from the Holy Spirit utilise it!!

 3 personal nuggets / words of wisdom - For Young Women - By a Woman

  • There is only one you in this entire universe and that's your super power. It would be such a tragedy if you don't appreciate yourself enough cause there will never be another you again. 

  • It's okay to be there for others but always make sure you don't give from an empty cup. Take time to refill your own cup and take care of yourself unapologetically. Take time out from the noise of the world and spend some quality bonding time with yourself, be it over coffee, a solo movie date. Whatever personal bonding looks like for you, make sure you do this from time to time.

  • You are beautiful inside out, don't let your past experiences, your family back ground or your current situation tell you otherwise. You have absolutely no reason not to put yourself first. God loved you and chose you for a purpose. You can only thrive if you learn the art of choosing and putting yourself first.
Now back to you...

When first did you realise the importance of 'choosing yourself'? And what one nugget of wisdom would you share from your personal journey. 

Comment below and lets create a conversation around this topic.

See you down below in the comments....

Author Profile:

A strong believer in the message of God’s Grace. Resilient, unflinching and graceful. Passionate about women and called to stand with and for the broken. YouTuber, Blogger and Worshipper. She is also a good friend of "The Teacher's Show".

Name of Blogger: Precious Melody
Instagram Handle: @precie_meloe
Twitter Handle: @muswandigere 
Facebook Handle: Precious Melody Muswandigere
Youtube Channel Handle: Precious Melody
Podcast Handle: Precious Muswandigere

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